Life as we know it

Life as we know it

So many things happening in the world around us. As some of us sit at home awaiting an outcome, others are going on with their daily lives. How do we go back to the new normal? Was this really all necessary? Just some questions I’ve been pondering as my own life continues forward safely from home. Those questions were all COVID related and had nothing to do with protesting or support for the our brothers and sisters who are hurting.

The last three months have been terrifying, frustrating and emotional. They have also been rewarding and allowed for internal and outward reflection within myself and my home. I have enjoyed having my husband home, enjoyed homeschooling my daughter and organizing home projects that were in need of attention. I’ve taken up new hobbies and kept my mind and body busy in different ways. I am taking a seat back and allowing this time to retrain my way of thinking as we move forward.

During this time my husband and I suffered another pregnancy loss and although every loss is heartbreaking for us as we continue on this secondary infertility journey. We were able to come together and manage our feelings without the outside stressors of work or repeated visits to the doctor. Our journey doesn’t end, we will keep trying. I will say that doing this naturally without the help of fertility has lessened my stress levels and the fact that we have been able to get pregnant on our own four times without fertility drugs gives us hope.

Struggling with infertility after a traumatic loss is difficult. It requires a lot of internal work on my part. With every loss brings back all the feels of losing Zoe, and it’s difficult at times to process both losses at the same time. I remind myself that I am strong! I am a Mother! I can and will handle whatever life throws at me and it will not break me. IT will make me stronger! I will grow and learn, I will achieve great things no matter what that looks like. I will continue to have HOPE and continue to be the best human that I can be.

So, as we look at the world around us and everything that people are fighting for; remember to also check in with yourself. It’s very easy for outside stressors to allow us to lose sight of our own fights, our own struggles which then makes everything feel like it is collapsing around us. Check in, take time for self care, meditate and then go save the world!

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